2020 in review

Last year I was so very glad to see 2019 end. It had not been a great year for me, and I had high hopes for this year. I had some running goals, some health goals, work goals, etc. Yeah so that didn’t exactly go as planned, huh.

What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before? 

• In January, I was 35 miles away from a major volcano eruption in the Philippines. What I thought were little flies biting me were actually pieces of volcanic ash bouncing off my face. At the time, we had no idea if we would be able to fly back to the States as Taal kept rumbling. Hard to believe that was this year.
• I ran the furthest I’ve ever run as I trained for my first ever marathon (not quite 18 miles, more about that later).
• I ran two virtual half marathons. Ugh, virtual races are just not much fun.
• My third metatarsal in my right foot broke right up high in the neck while running. 
• And of course I’m living in a time of pandemic (or to use a more Biblical term, a pestilence). 

Did anyone close to you give birth? 

Grace Elizabeth was born January 25, 2020. I'm still incredibly honored that she shares a name with me, and I am so glad I’ve gotten to visit her and her parents twice this year. I wish it were more.

Did anyone close to you die? 

No. But I’m definitely affected by the COVID-related deaths this year. I don’t see how you can be a normal human being with any kind of heart and not be affected.

Did you suffer illness or injury? 

Yes. Once again I broke a bone while doing the sport I love. This thing has taken forever to heal, which is very annoying. I’ve also had nerve pain from the top of my right foot shooting down into my big toe since last March. None of the orthopedists I’ve seen are concerned so while I have a scheduled nerve conduction test in April, I’m continuing to work out. If the weather ever cooperates, I will bike and run, foot pain be damned. 

As with the broken pelvis, I’m using a bone growth stimulator and will be for another 130+ days.

What countries did you visit? 

In January, I spent three weeks in Manila for work. Volcano and the start of the pandemic aside, that was a really cool trip and I’m glad I got to see a part of the world I probably wouldn’t have gone to on my own dime.

What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020? 

A vaccine for COVID. 

I’d also like to break a pattern that seems to be emerging in my life:

• 2017—cancer diagnosis
• 2018—bone fracture
• 2019—cancer diagnosis
• 2020—bone fracture
• 2021—??

What dates from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? 

• January 12: Taal erupted 
• January 25: Grace was born
• February 3: I turned 60
• February 14: we met Grace
• March 13: my city locked down for COVID and we began working from home (I will be working from home at least through the end of June 2021)
• May 6: third metatarsal broke
• August 22: got my hair cut short and went blonde 

There are other events but the dates aren’t etched—we got to see Grace and her family over Labor Day weekend but sadly have had to cancel all other trips. 

What was your biggest achievement of the year? 

In April, along with probably every other sewist in the country, I fired up my sewing machine and cranked out nearly 100 face masks for friends, family and in one case, the family of a friend (that family lives in Ireland so I can truthfully say my masks were international!).

One real bright spot this year, or I should more accurately say two bright spots are our COVID kittens. I'm so glad we got them. 

I also decided to give veganism a try. Originally I planned to try for about a month but here I am, nearly at the six month mark and I think I'll stick with it. Health-wise I already had great numbers for cholesterol but saw huge improvement there anyway. My LDL dropped from 70 to 35, which made me blink! 

And I busted through a big hang up of mine when SheFit asked me to send a photo of me wearing their bra to be used in a social media campaign. 

But honestly this year has felt like I’m just marking time. I’d planned to train and run my first full marathon this year both as a way to say screw you cancer and to celebrate turning 60. I was very disappointed when the race went virtual but of course on May 6, it was all moot anyway when my foot broke. 

I did run two virtual half marathons, and I don’t think I’ll do that again. It’s just a real slog. 

What was the best thing you bought? 

I wrote a very long post about things we bought this year to make our home comfy and cozy.

Where did most of your money go? 

And of course, that post also describes where our money went (as it sure didn’t go for traveling). We did have a lot of medical expenses but not nearly what we had in 2019.

What did you get really excited about? 

I didn't know it was going to happen, but my mother, sister and brother surprised me so much I staggered when they were all at a restaurant to celebrate my 60th birthday. That was absolutely surreal and wonderful.

I was so excited to be training to run that marathon. I’d done a lot of research to find one that was not horrible in terms of the route but also not hard to travel to, and Grandma’s seemed like the perfect one. Plus it’s in June so I knew I could get in a proper training schedule since I wouldn’t have to do most of the training in winter. And I’d found a running coach because I wanted to train safely and sanely.

So words are inadequate, I cannot tell you how heartsick I was when I broke my foot. I sat in that urgent orthopedic clinic and knew, I just knew that it was broken and that I would not be healed in time to run the marathon. I’m not much of a crier, but I teared up there in that office.

And in November when it looked like I had a non-union fracture, I was crushed. I’d already been researching bikes so that same day I got that news, I went to a local bike shop and ordered a bike. I’ve been able to ride a few times but I need it to be a little less windy and I also need shoe covers to be able to ride in the Kansas winter weather.

For the second year in a row, it’s been a really hard year. I sometimes feel as though I’m digging a hole in dry sand only of course the sand will not stay out of the hole so I keep digging, digging, digging, all for nothing.

What book(s) did you love this year? 

I continue to be an indiscriminate reader (escapism at its finest) and devour all sorts of fiction, especially science fiction, some fantasy (I’m very, very picky) and a fair amount of post-apocalyptic fiction. 

However I don’t advise reading Station Eleven when in a foreign country as a pandemic starts (yes, I thought I would re-read it when I was in Manila and COVID-19 was breaking loose in China and Southeast Asia—not my best plan). 

What song will always remind you of 2020? 

Once again, I’m boring. I’ve been listening to the Housewerks playlist on Spotify. This song cracked me up last spring.

Update on the Shittens

It’s hard to believe but the kittens/Shittens are going on six months old. They’ve grown a lot, helped no doubt by getting rid of all those parasites and eating both their kitten chow and the adult cat chow. They continue to make us laugh (mostly), curse (sometimes) and shake our heads at the weirdness of cats (pretty often).

Little Annie has the sweetest personality and the longest tail. Our little Cow Girl (we call her that because of how her fur looks) is the one who wouldn’t take no from Eddie and was convinced from the beginning that he was her best friend ever (except for her sister). She cuddles with him all the time, whether he wants it or not, and it’s pretty sweet to see them grooming each other. She’s not a lap cat unless we’re on the couch with our legs stretched out, and then she’s right up there with us.

She’s also a huge water baby. She gets in the sink, any sink, and licks the faucet in hopes water comes out. She also tries to open the shower door when one of us is actually in there taking a shower. She hasn’t managed to do that yet but I think it’s just a matter of time.

Stevie also loves the water and is quite the jumper. She easily gets onto any high surface, it’s like gravity has no effect on her. She also can be a bit of a bully. All the cats prefer the bed on my desk as it’s got a light directly over it that acts as a heat lamp. I’ve watched her slither into that bed when Eddie is in there (she wouldn’t dare try this with Wally) and then start picking on him, batting at him and biting until he leaves. I stop her when I see it but I know she does it other times too. 

Unlike her sister, Stevie is definitely a lap cat and also still loves to chew wires. I’ve now replaced the earbuds to my laptop twice and keep them locked up when not in use. 

Here's a little collage from this past weekend. We put the tissue paper and wrapping paper from our presents on the floor so the kitties could have some Christmas fun too.

An update and a vegan Christmas

First things first.

I realized that waiting wasn't going to make that three minute plank feel any easier plus tonight Kent and I are attending a virtual wine tasting. I'm positive that planks are easier when I haven't had alcohol the night before, so I just went ahead and did the three minute plank this morning. My form wasn't the best there at the end but I stayed off my knees and finished.

Now to our vegan holiday meals. 

For our Christmas Eve meal, I made Kung Pao Brussels Sprouts with rice noodles. These were GREAT and definitely something I'll make again. In fact, they are so good I made them again last night.

We finally got around to making vegan eggnog, which my son calls a nut smoothie (he's not wrong). I'm not a fan of real eggnog, even before changing to veganism, but this was really good. 

I made pumpkin scones, which were billed as a dupe for Starbucks pumpkin scones. These were quite good, although next time I’ll boost the spices even more. 

I also made apple strudel waffles for Christmas breakfast. This was super simple—it’s puff pastry with thinly sliced apples in the middle, along with cinnamon and sugar. You basically make a grown-up pop tart and cook it in the waffle iron. I topped them with coconut whipped cream, and they were pretty good. I would make them again for Kent, but I personally prefer the pumpkin scones. They were also very filling so we didn’t even worry about our big meal until later in the day.

I'd promised Kent I would make him a mocha latte, so here's the mocha sauce in progress:

And a beauty shot of my mocha latte from this weekend:

We’d found this recipe for lasagna and wanted to see if it lived up to the reviews. In a word, YES. This was amazing, and we are still enjoying it. As written, she says you get eight large servings and she isn't kidding. We went with 12 and didn't feel deprived at all. 

I also made half a recipe of this festive kale salad and wow it’s so good. I’m now experimenting with the nutritional yeast without all the nuts as the nuts make for a much higher calorie count. But the taste was very similar to Parmesan and we both loved the salad.

I made the same dessert for Christmas as I’d made for Thanksgiving, the veganized NYT Pumpkin Sticky Toffee pudding and wow, yes, that one is a keeper.

Planksmas

 In my last post, I mentioned that I like challenges. What I didn't talk about was the planksmas challenge I've been doing this month, along with some other posters on the Breast Cancer Org forums. There's a group of us who post our daily workouts to help each out stay motivated and accountable. 

Here's the challenge:

Today was day 28 so the plank was two minutes, 30 seconds long. I have to say, this is tough. One of the other women who's doing this posted a modified schedule. She's going to take it slower and finish mid-January. I briefly, briefly flirted with doing the same but realize that was a big no. I want this challenge done ASAP. Just hope I can hit that three minute mark.

I like having goals

My niece (who's named after me) is into fitness. She loves weight lifting and is pretty good at it. She's also working on mastering her hand stand; she kicks up to the wall just fine but wants to get to the point where nothing supports her.

I saw the photo of her taking a foot off the wall and posted that I wondered if I could still do a hand stand. Years ago, when I was a little girl, I fell in love with gymnastics as I watched the 1968 Olympics. We had a dinky black & white TV with awful resolution but I didn't care. I was mesmerized watching those girls fly around doing their floor routines, the uneven bars, all of it.

I pestered my folks to let me take gymnastics and they found a place that met at my elementary school on Saturday mornings. So I walked there every Saturday morning and did my darndest to turn into a gymnast. But let's be honest. I am a stick, I was born a stick and I will no doubt die a stick so while I learned to do handstands, cartwheels and round-offs, I was too inflexible to master a basic back bend. 

That didn't stop me from avidly watching the 1972 Olympics when I and probably every other 12 year old in the US was captivated by Olga Korbut. I kept dabbling in gymnastics but I knew in my heart that will power doesn't equal talent and so I moved on to other things. I ended up falling in love with running, thanks to the Army, and have tried other sports as well (roller blading is fun, I'm not very good at it; I'm not a good softball player either but I sure tried, and so on). When I lived in Germany (thanks to the Army), I was the assistant coach to the girls gymnastics team from my Army post and loved working with them as they mastered their routines. 

Anyway, fast forward to this week and my rash statement about wondering if I could still do a hand stand (which I did master). My niece seized on that and said I should try and so I did. 

I have some work to do, although I'm closer than I thought I would be. But I think I can master it again, and I'm going to give it a try. My core is strong enough, and so are my arms but my right hammie did not like the kick  up at all.

I'd like to do one proper hand stand by my birthday on February 3. I'll be 61 and I think it would be a hoot to do a hand stand to celebrate.

Christmas with kittens

Means no tree. Well not our usual tree. Instead, I put this little tree on our dining room table with a tree skirt. This tree has a story that goes back to 2009. 

We'd flooded (for the first of three times) and were displaced, living in temporary housing while our place was made livable again. So we didn't have a Christmas tree, we barely had clothes to be honest because we lost a lot of stuff in that flood. And Kent had been notified he would be getting laid off and I hadn't been able to find work in Boston.

We were in Target to get construction paper to make a Christmas tree. I saw this tree and really wanted to get it only you know it was $20 and for where we were (no jobs, our apartment flooded and uninhabitable) that was money we didn't have. Kent insisted we get it so we could have a little Christmas decoration, and all of Target in the South End got to see me cry. 

Flash forward 11 years and the reason for no Christmas tree is positive this time. Our two little kittens would absolutely destroy any tree so I'm resigned to no tree until probably 2022. Not even kidding. That's ok, I would rather have the kittens anyway.

Here's our fireplace. My mother made that wall hanging decades ago and it's one of my favorite things she's made. Hanging that is part of our Christmas decorating ritual every year. We have five hooks for stockings, and until last year would hang all five: two for the humans and three for the cats. Then Chloe died and I was gone a lot last December and all of January. Now of course we have four cats but still only five hooks. So yes, the stockings are for the cats. 

I always think of Queen's Fat-bottomed Girls

I picked up my new bike last Saturday, plus a bunch of other stuff so I can ride (shoes, helmet, lights, water bottle holder, dinky little repair kit that fits neatly into the onboard storage compartment, a shirt, some padded shorts—all very $$). 

I was all set to ride Sunday morning but had gear issues. I work out first thing in the morning, so it’s dark. No worries, I have a Nox Gear Tracer 360 vest that lights up like crazy, and of course I’d bought the headlight and taillight for my bike. Only the batteries were dead in my vest. OK, I replaced them. And those batteries were dead. Grrr. I decided it would be OK to ride with just the headlight and taillight so headed out. Only I could not get the headlight on. So I scrapped riding that morning and charged both lights.

My first ride was on Monday, and I got a later start than I would have preferred. That meant I had more traffic, which frankly scares the snot out of me. I got a little lost and ended up on Mission, which has a lot of traffic and right now is down to one lane each way due to construction. I couldn't get off that street fast enough. Plus it was wicked cold—the temperature was 33 and the wind chill was 25.

Here’s where running in cold weather differs from biking in the same weather: I wore all my good cold weather running gear (tank top, long sleeve heat-tech shirt, long sleeve biking shirt, medium weight running jacket to block the wind, bike shorts, heat-tech tights, wind pants, wool socks, a winter weight headband plus my helmet, and my warmest running glove/mittens) and it wasn’t enough. I have not been that cold on any run, not even the one in 9F with the wind chill below zero. My thumbs especially hurt all day long as did my pinky toes. 

So I was super proud of myself for getting back out there yesterday in nearly the same weather for another ride. Fortunately, the wind was slightly less, and I felt a little more confident so was able to go a little faster (especially uphill, I do love hills). Once again, my thumbs hurt all day yesterday after thawing out. A friend suggested getting silk glove liners and I remembered that I’d bought a pair last year on clearance but not in time for that run.

I dug them out for this morning's ride. Normally I wouldn't ride back to back but the weather for the next 10 days looks like crap for cycling: rain tomorrow, snow on Saturday, and temps in the low to mid 20s through at least next Saturday. But today it was 40F with less wind. I also felt a lot more confident shifting gears and just riding in general. The silk glove liners helped some, but it’s clear I need better cold weather cycling gloves. 

That I’m even trying this is kind of a big deal. When I was 12, I had a pretty bad bike accident—I fell and hit the left side of my head on the curb and was unconscious. When I woke up, I was three blocks from where I’d fallen and a stranger was standing over me asking me loudly if I were OK. Being 12, I’d had the whole stranger danger drilled into me so I remember being really scared of him, and telling him I was fine. He asked where I lived and honestly it took a bit to remember. While I did keep cycling as a kid, I was always so very afraid I would crash like that again.

I think the fear will grow less as I get more proficient. It's hard being so bad at something, but I'm determined to master this. 

Neural flossing or what’s next with my foot

 Yes! Another update about my foot!

I saw the fourth doctor yesterday—this is the one who’s a foot/ankle specialist. He reviewed my MRI and examined my foot. He said he thinks the bone is healing based on what he sees in the MRI. The pain/discomfort where the bone broke is almost certainly due to how it’s healed. Because it’s the third metatarsal, and because of the way people walk, the bone has a tiny upward curve now. That’s not a malunion. He said the pain that I feel on both sides of the healed broken bone are the second and fourth metatarsals experiencing a bit of stress. It’s nothing to worry about. So that was good.

But I’ve had nerve pain radiating from the top of my foot down through the big toe since mid-March. I’d gotten seen for that right before lock-down and nothing showed on the x-ray. I re-laced my shoes, so the laces didn’t cross that top boney part and tied them quite loosely as sometimes runners have pain from overly tight laces. 

That didn’t help, unfortunately. Fast forward to today and I have the shooting burning pain through my big toe, up toward my ankle now also and pins and needles across the ball of my foot. That nerve pain caught his attention. He’s referred me to get a nerve conduction test and an EMG. He warned me those are not pleasant tests but said they’ll help identify any issues with how my nerves are working.  He also asked if I were using Voltaren (which I am) and, he said, some people have found relief with CBD oil. Well I don’t have CBD oil, but I do have a lotion and some ointments. 

He also recommended I do neural or nerve flossing for my foot, which may help with the pain. I’ve done something similar with my piriformis when I was in PT for that a few years ago, and found some tutorials on foot neural flossing on Youtube.

So the referral has been placed. Now that I’ve had a hot minute to think things through, I’m going to ask for those tests to be scheduled in January. As Kent says, we are in the stage of life where we’re probably going to hit our deductibles every year so no worries there. Plus I’d like to see if the neural flossing and various gels and ointments help. I won’t lie, the idea of that EMG test horrifies me, needles in my foot? Plus electric currents? YOUCH.

Bonus kitten picture collage of Annie. Both kittens are growing and doing well, no signs of parasites any more and they're still snuggly purr machines. Annie tends to flop around like this a lot and is proof that cats are liquid.

A vegan Thanksgiving

 I wanted to capture what we had for my first vegan Thanksgiving—honestly, this was Kent’s too although he isn’t vegan. And I did tell him he was welcome to prepare dishes with animal products in them (thinking of the green bean casserole, or turkey, stuffing and gravy). He said he didn’t want to, that he wanted to try what I was going to cook. So it was a vegan meal all the way around.

I’d found some Thanksgiving recipes for two from the New York Times that weren’t vegan, but I was pretty sure I could make them vegan. I won't bother linking to the NYT recipes because if you don't have a full subscription, you won't be able to access them. 

From the NYT, we had Maple Roasted Squash with Sage and Lime:

And Caramelized Brussels sprouts with vegan bacon. We will reduce the amount of apple cider vinegar the next time we make this and use a whole grain mustard instead of the Dijon we used:

Kent made the vegan bacon (or phacon as I called it) the night before Thanksgiving. It's made with coconut flakes and is quite good.

And Roasted Carrots, Faro and Lentils with *Cashew Sauce, which we've had before. This recipe is similar; I used one from a vegan cookbook my mother passed along to me.

We enjoyed this wine (even though we ate at noon and boy, drinking during the day sure makes me snoozy for the rest of the day.

Dessert was this very decadent NYT Pumpkin Sticky Toffee pudding with the most amazing sauce. This has what’s described as a soft cake-like texture. I thought it was similar to pumpkin bread only even better. We very briefly considered splitting one but didn't. And wouldn't in the future and agreed it was a Very Good Thing the recipe made two servings or we would have eaten it all.

*I’m so impressed with the sauces we can make with cashews. Those form the basis of the vegan Alfredo sauce we use on our pizza, with scalloped potatoes and of course with fettucine. 

Well this is confusing

 From my MRI report:

There is a non-displaced fracture involving the third metatarsal neck. There is no acute bone marrow or soft tissue edema. The findings may reflect a fracture nonunion. 

From my x-ray report a week later (and I promise you nothing has changed in my foot):

A band of sclerosis is present involving the distal diaphysis of the third metatarsal. This is felt to represent a healed stress fracture.

Those are pretty different diagnoses. I've got a note into the super duper specialist (the one who actually ordered this x-ray last week) to see which one is accurate. Because honestly if the x-ray findings are accurate, not only will I be ecstatic I'll also go running. 

Bonus kitty picture to spice things up.

And here's the reply from Dr. R's nurse:

I spoke with Dr. R and he said the xray is what gives us the most up to date information. So I would say the Xray is gospel!  He said basically you are producing a band of sclerosis in that area which is your body's way of trying to heal the stress fracture.  He said that this could be an area of what is called hyperostotic non-union or is an area of bone formation in the face of a non-union.  He explained that typically those situation do go on to heal but they may require surgical intervention.  He encourages you to keep your appointment with the foot specialist.  

Update on my broken foot

Yesterday, I saw the podiatrist to go over my MRI results of my foot. Turns out that I absolutely no question about it have a non-union fracture. 

My podiatrist is great, answered all my questions including the one where I said that I've had two kinds of cancers, and while I know bone mets in a metatarsal is very rare, the chance of that is still a number greater than zero. She paused and said you know I think it would make the most sense for you to see Dr. Rosenthal, who specializes in bone or soft tissue tumors. She's going to get that referral going and she told me to be extremely clear on my history so he has a full picture.

That makes sense to me because otherwise on the face of it, this looks like it was a stress fracture and I have bad bones. Only my bones weren't that bad when I had my DEXA scan nearly two years ago. The actual values indicated osteopenia but nowhere near osteoporosis. I got that osteoporosis dx from my endocrinologist after my pelvis fractured.

As I told my podiatrist, that fracture absolutely was from over training. I've mentioned before that I ran 6 races in about two months' time: three half marathons, a 5K, a 12K and a 10K. That last 10K I know it was broken, man that race hurt. So yes, that was a stress fracture.

But with my foot this year, that wasn't the case. I was training slowly, sanely, under the care of a running coach and a physical therapist. I had no warning, nothing, the bone just broke.

That's the history she wants me to make sure to share. I still hope/think this is just a non-union fracture and if I have to have surgery to repair it, then yikes but OK I will. But if it's not, then I need whatever it is to be addressed too.

I am beyond discouraged.

Hygge in Kansas

 Hygge is a Danish and Norwegian word for a mood of coziness and comfortable conviviality with feelings of wellness and contentment. I think of it as quiet satisfaction, and since Kent and I have been working from home for nearly eight months, we’ve –or maybe it’s more accurate to say I’ve—focused on making our home more comfy and cozy, more hygge. And we’ve done a lot!

In no particular order:

I got this because it made me laugh and also goes with the overall colors in our living/kitchen area.

Ding dong the pergola is GONE (and we do not miss it one bit).

I actually got these new house numbers in 2019 but we didn't do anything with them until this year so it counts.

Back yard without the pergola plus you can see our wonderful sun umbrella and the paint scheme.

Action shot of Kent doing I don't even remember what to the umbrella.

Completed paint job plus our new chairs (we also got the table but I'm too lazy to dig up that photo too).

I repainted the sun face (it was green and rusty). It really pops now.

I also repainted Fat Cat, he'd faded a lot and now he's a vivid part of the yar.

I ran two virtual half marathons and also did a COVID virtual challenge (but then of course that stupid bone in my foot broke). But it was all hygge until then.

Hummingbird feeder and a HUMMINGBIRD! I was so excited to see that!

So very many surprise lilies!

A small fountain, which we both love.

I got special mugs and started using the frother on our Ninja coffee maker. I do like a decaf latte.

A tidy solution for all our masks.

The big 72" cat tree. It's now in the second bedroom, and the kittens love it. The platforms are a bit small for our big boy cats.

Two COVID kittens. Definitely hygge.

Privacy screens for the litter boxes (they were in a kid's tent from IKEA, this is a lot less . . . gaudy).

A rowing machine. I made a cover for the rail so it doesn't get dusty, and the kittens think it's wildly fun to play with that fabric.

We reorganized the Billies at the end of our dining room and put a lot of our baking/cooking supplies in there. It's so much easier for me to get stuff now as I'm just 5'4 1/2" and need a step stool for the top shelves of the kitchen cabinets.

I got more cloth napkins, four each of the three you see below. We kicked the paper napkin habit years ago but I wanted prettier ones. 

New kitchen bar stools. Yes they are very orange, also comfortable and work really well in our home.

My office set up, which includes a second table to make an L shaped desk, a second monitor, and my office chair. 

This fabulous tea kettle. The color is ombre, getting darker toward the bottom of the kettle.

Our refurbished Vitamix (that's the chili paste for a pozole in there). So glad we got that.

And a bigger Breville than the one we had (which we passed along to one of Kent's co-workers who adores it). We adore this one and use it nearly every single day.