I ran across this video the other day, and was curious if I’d heard many or any of the 48 comments. Much to my—well surprise isn’t the right word, maybe sad resignation is better—I had heard nearly all of them.
I have a story of my own to tell.
In 2011, Kent and I took a short vacation in Negril. This was our second time there and we’d had a relaxing time. We were waiting to catch the commuter flight from Negril to Montego Bay and one of the men who worked at the local airport was making small talk with us.
Somehow it came up in the conversation that we have grandchildren. He was shocked and commented that I didn’t look like a grandmother. I told him that I was and that I’d passed the half century mark and lived every year.
He looked me up and down, and then said “You must have been a goddess when you were young.”
Stop for a moment and consider those words. Never mind the looking up and down (which happens to women all the time and we are expected to either not notice or not mind). Think about the implications of what he said to me.
What I thought (but didn’t say and have regretted ever since that I didn't) is that I’m as much of a goddess now as I was 30 years ago, that being a goddess has nothing to do with age and in fact not much to do with looks.
I have a story of my own to tell.
In 2011, Kent and I took a short vacation in Negril. This was our second time there and we’d had a relaxing time. We were waiting to catch the commuter flight from Negril to Montego Bay and one of the men who worked at the local airport was making small talk with us.
Somehow it came up in the conversation that we have grandchildren. He was shocked and commented that I didn’t look like a grandmother. I told him that I was and that I’d passed the half century mark and lived every year.
He looked me up and down, and then said “You must have been a goddess when you were young.”
Stop for a moment and consider those words. Never mind the looking up and down (which happens to women all the time and we are expected to either not notice or not mind). Think about the implications of what he said to me.
What I thought (but didn’t say and have regretted ever since that I didn't) is that I’m as much of a goddess now as I was 30 years ago, that being a goddess has nothing to do with age and in fact not much to do with looks.
I know this sort of thing happens all the time. I hear it about my marriage to Kent (he is younger). I'll be clear with you that the cougar comment offends me. I'm not a cougar, I am a woman who happens to be deeply in love with a younger man. No one would think twice about the reverse situation.
I suspect that I'm going to end up being that one woman, the one who got more outspoken as she grew older and realized that some things ought not be said, and some attitudes need to be changed. I'm OK with that.
